Ok, this is usually not my type of posts... But I could really need some opinions, or experiences.
It started about a week ago, I noticed some small "spots" on my stomach. I didn't care that much, I thought it just might be some "fleas" (?) or something like that... But a few days later the spots had grown into something VERY itchy, and I figured out it had to be chickenpox! Since my friend recently had it and it's very contagious.. But NOW,, I don't know anymore! It's so itchy I can't even sleep at night, I'm trying not to scratch but... You know.
So I did some research, and of course my rash could be ANYTHING that pops up on google, because it's really hard to tell since it's so many similar diseases out there... But the thing I fear the most is psoreasis guttate (dråpe psoreasis), since my mother has it (not the guttate, but the "regular" type).. But I think it's strange that it's SO itchy?? It's so itchy - I'm like shaking !!! Plus, it doesn't seem to "flake" that much (thank God) - yet.... Another thing it might be, is something that looks very similar, pityriasis rosea, caused by a virus, and that doesn't last forever, compared to psoreasis, which can only be treated.
DUDE, I don't know... Going to the doctor tomorrow. Hopefully he/ she'll know the answer!! But I really CAN'T have psoreasis... I know it's not the end of the world, I know many people who has it and still looks amazing and stuff, but no one react the same way.. Of course I would have to move to a warmer place since sunlight and saltwater is the best thing for a skin disease like that.. But I love cold Norway, and I also USED TO love my skin!!! My smooth baby skin is (was..) the only thing I truly loved with myself, and now... I feel like SHIT. FUCK. And the worst thing (besides from the itchy-thing) is that I even have the rash on my neck and some parts on my face too! Psoreasis spots on my stomach I CAN survive, but rash on my FACE I CAN NOT handle! Make-up cover up a lot of things, but if this gets worse I would totally have to move to Florida or California... Maybe Australia. That wouldn't be too bad, but I don't wanna get tanned!!! Tanned skin is so Jersey Shore.. Yuck. I want to have pale, smooth skin (that doesn't ITCH) :( Faen i helvete asså ARRRRRRGH.
Then again... I googled psoreasis guttate and Kim Kardashian-something popped up. I don't know who she is, but she looks hot and it seems like she has it too.. Maybe it's not the end of the world even if it is psoreasis, but I would be totally crushed anyway.. I NEED to love something with myself... Now I've lost the one thing that made me feel good.. WHY couldn't it be chicken pox!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!??!?!?
...this is how my "stomach area" look (taken a couple of days ago):
You probably never saw me in a bikini with my pretty-skin either, but at least the option was there.. Now that will NEVER happen. Fuck.. *Scratch, scratch*